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Personal History for Jason Windsor

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Dedication Chapter

Title of Your Autobiography

Wanderlust: A Tale of Stationary Movement

About the Author:

Um, I'm me. Jason Aaron Windsor. Nice to meet you.

Date of completion.

Began on February 16th, 2006

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Just The Facts

In a few pages, what is summary of your life story?

Born during the most intense blizzard in North Carolina's history, my parents drove 2 hours in the snow to the only hospital they could afford. Being my mother and father only got harder from there.

Please enter the date you began answering these questions.

2/16/2006

What is your name (first, middle, maiden name, last)? Do you like your name? If you could, would you choose another? What name would you choose? Who were you named for?

Jason Aaron Windsor

I guess I like it. I'm a firm believer that the most beautiful sound to anyone's ears is the sound of their own name. It's not self-obsession, just simple psychology. People react to the sound of their own name more than any other sound.

Maybe "Mike Crapbag". Or "Princess Consuela Bananahammock".

I don't think I was named for anyone in particular, except my middle name being the Biblical character Aaron, which isn't exactly inspiring considering he was the guy behind the guy destined for greatness. It's like being told, "Hey, one day you'll be the personal assistant to the guy who makes a difference. He likes cream in his coffee."

Are you male or female?

(checking) Male. Oh yeah, definately male.

In what country, state, and city were you born? What hospital?

I was born in Chapel Hill, NC, USA. Chapel Hill Memorial Hospital. I once had a crush on a girl born the same week as me in the same hospital. We didn't really have much else in common.

What is your birth order?

I am the oldest of 3.

How old are you today? How old do you feel?

I am currently 28. I feel about 40.

Do you speak any foreign languages?

I used to be fluent in French, but now only can consider myself conversational.

What is your birth date?

January 11th, 1978

Are you right-handed or left-handed?

Right-handed.

Are you near-sighted or far-sighted?

Near-sighted. I wear glasses all the time.

What is your height, your weight, your eye color? Do you wear corrective lenses?

I am about 6'3", and currently weigh around 340lbs. I wear glasses.

What is your mate's name?

Well, my girlfriend is named Alisa.

What is your anniversary date? How many years have you been married or were you married?

Not yet married. Alisa and I started dating on June 12, 2004, so nearly two years.

Are you overweight or underweight?

Overweight.

What is, or was, your occupation?

I am currently a sound engineer/editor for VirtuosoWorks, Inc., makers of Notion Music software.

What is your race? What is your religion? What is your political affiliation?

I am white.

I am a Christian.

I am a moderate Republican.

Do you live in the suburbs, a city, a town, or in a rural area? What is the population? Do you live in an apartment, a house, a condominium, or a retirement home?

I live in an apartment in a relatively large city, with a population of approx. 300,000 people.

Are you allergic to anything? What is your blood type?

I am allergic to lots of things, most notably dust, dander, cut grass, and seafood. My blood type is A-Negative.

Please add a question or fact that you would like to answer or share.

I guess I would be remiss to not discuss my faith on some level.

I'm a Christian. Unfortunately, this causes a visceral reaction in some who've had bad experiences with people claiming to know God. My faith, for me, boils down to some simple facts, the most notable of which being that Jesus likes me. If this is the only fact I can keep straight in my head, then I'm doing well.

I think my biggest problem with most Christians is the idea of morality. I believe in true morality, that there are standards we are meant to live by. God made those rules because of His love for us and desire to protect us, not so He could rain out our Saturday but because He has a broader scope of the ramifications of our actions. He told Moses to wash his hands after he buried a dead body. Moses didn't know about bacteria or microbes, but God did, so He made a law expecting Moses to obey it, not to inconvenience Moses, but to protect him from things he couldn't see. I believe the rules God made for man to live by are all common in their intent; to protect us from things we can't see. It's not so we can be superior or boastful, but so we can live our lives the way God designed.

Unfortunately, some Christians have imposed their sense of morality on people who do not share their faith. Since we live the way we think God wants us to as a form of worship to God, how can we impose that on people who don't even believe God exists? It's ridiculous and has made the American Christian community look more like a pissy mother-in-law to the country than bearers of mercy we're called to be. I think the fact that we worship morality and not God has gotten in the way of us acting on issues of social justice and the politics of Christianity have kept us from being Jesus to a world that needs to be fed and clothed, not told how to vote.

How would you describe yourself?

I wouldn't. I'd let other people do it, but only let them use the words incredible, charming, handsome, and egomaniacal.

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Your Family and Ancestry

List the names and birthdates of your mother, father, maternal grandmother, paternal grandmother, maternal grandfather, paternal grandfather and other great grandfathers and grandmothers. What did you call them?

Mother: Katrina Hilliard Parnell (Mom) DOB: 4/6/1954
Father: Kenneth David Windsor (Dad) DOB: 3/31/1955
Paternal Grandmother: Louise Buckland Hensley (Mamaw) DOB: 10/?/1938?
Paternal Grandfather: Kenneth Mattheu Windsor DOB: ? DOD: 1984?
Paternal Step-Grandfather: Andrew Jackson Hensley (Papaw) DOB: ?
Maternal Grandmother: Osyth Mason Hilliard (Grandma Toosey) DOB: ?
Maternal Grandfather: William Hilliard (Grandaddy Bill) DOB: ?
Paternal Great-Grandmother: Barbara Buckland (Grandma) DOB: 1914? DOD: 2004?
Paternal Great-Grandfather: Howard Buckland (Grandpa) DOB: 1911? DOD: 1999?

Do you have brothers and sisters? What are their names? When were they born? Do you remember the first time you saw them?

Brother: Matthew David Windsor
DOB: 1/17/1981 in Lakeland, FL
I don't really remember the first time I saw him. I had just turned three when he was born, so I guess he's always been around.

Sister: Rachel Lauren Windsor Labbe
DOB: 5/31/1984 in Greensboro, NC
I was six when Rachel was born, and while I don't remember seeing her in the hospital, exactly, I do remember being there. I can picture the room my mom was in, and I remember a scary movie playing on the television at the foot of her bed. I think it may have been Labrynth, but I could be wrong. I remember a very scary black knight in the movie that kept me awake at night for a time after that.

Half-Sister: Taylor Leigh Windsor (Daughter of my father David and his second wife Anna)
DOB: 1/29/1993
I remember getting a phone call at my mom's house, my dad telling me that Taylor was on her way. I was 15. My mom asked me what was going on and I told her, knowing she hadn't heard yet that my dad's second wife was even pregnant. I saw Taylor a week later or so, and for some bizarre reason couldn't stop stroking her head.

Where was your mother born? Where was your father born? What circumstances brought your parents to the place where you were born? Were there people already there whom they knew, or did they come into the community alone? Was the community welcoming to them?

My mother was born in London, England. My father was born in Cleveland, Ohio. Each of the moved to North Carolina when they were young, and had lived here for years. My mother became a Christian in high school, I think, and I think she met my father at church.

Tell about your aunts and uncles. Did they play an important part in your growing up? Do you remember any special aunts and uncles?

My father has one brother, Mark, and two step-brothers, Mike and Tim. I have vague memories of Tim from when I was young, but he and my grandmother stopped getting along, so I haven't seen him in probably twenty years. Mark and Mike were around a lot growing up.

My mother has two brothers, Geoff and Steve, and two sisters, Janie and Robin. Janie used to babysit me a lot when I was young, and Geoff used to do magic tricks that always impressed me. Steve and Robn weren't around a whole lot, but I remember them fondly.

Did you play with your cousins? Who are some of the cousins you know best?

I have several cousins. Janie and her husband Scott have a daughter Brittan, and a son Jeremy. They are in college now, so were a bit younger than me, but they were good kids and are good adults now. Brittan is a very talented artist and Jeremy is an equally talented musician. My aunt Robin has three boys under the age of ten, who I've only seen a couple of times, and my uncle Geoff has two boys under ten, who I've seen a couple of times.

Was there someone your family was particularly proud of?

A lot of people in my family have done very well in their chosen fields, and while my whole family is very proud of them, there has never been a feeling of elitism from those who've gotten MDs and PhDs versus those who have only high school diplomas. I think that 's the thing to be most proud of.

If you could do anything differently about your family, what would it be?

I guess I wish we were all closer. My parents divorced when I was young, so the families split, and so many have moved away and stuff that it doesn't feel like a big happy family. I hope to have that for myself in the future.

Did the family get together much casually, or did you have to travel and dress up to spend time together?

It was usually casual. Christmas was always big at my grandmother's house, but that was usually the only time I saw them. I've tried getting over there more recently, but haven't as much as I'd like to.

Was yours a religious family? Did you attend services together? Were these dress-up affairs?

My parents are religious, but not in a traditional way. We never had to dress up for church or anything. It was very casual.

Did your family say grace? Did you sit down at the table together for every meal?

We rarely sat together at the table. We liked television too much.

Did your family take vacations? Did you go to the same place every year; a summer house or resort?

We only went on vacation a couple of times as a family. Usually to the beach. I remember it being okay, but we didn't spend a whole lot of time together. One trip in particular was fun, if not a little inconvenient because we were all in the same room together.

Do you remember any special stories your grandmother or grandfather told you? Do you tell any of the same stories to your grandkids?

I think I always liked hearing stories about my parents and grandparents from before I came along. I don't know a tremendous amount about my parents when they were kids, other than some occassional pictures. There are no pictures of my mom from before about age 20, so I have no idea what she looked like as a kid.

What was your relationship with your parents like? Would you describe it as warm? Formal? Loving? Stern? Demonstrative?

My relationship with my mom and stepdad was always sort of warmly distant. With my dad is was distant, with ocassional moments of warmth. I think my parents are fallible human beings who did the best they could.

Did your grandparents live nearby? How often did you visit their homes? Did their homes have a special cooking smell? Onions? Cookies? What did their couch feel like? How big was the kitchen? Describe their home as you remember it.

My grandparents always lived rather close by. My paternal grandparents had me over quite a bit, usually when I was visiting my dad. We were close with them and enjoyed staying with them alot. I remember staying up late and watching Johnny Carson there, sleeping with my brother on the hide-a-bed in the living room. I always associate them with ice cream because they owned a Baskin-Robbins until I was 18.

My maternal grandparents lived close by too, but I didn't spend a tremendous amount of time there. I remember my grandmother cooking and knitting a lot. At Easter she always had these large eggs made of sugar that you could look into and there were little scenes inside. She always had these great chocolates around, too. I've never seen them anywhere else, they had a bit of cake inside.

Did your family ever have a reunion? What were some of the best reunions and why?

We've never had a formal reunion, mostly just getting together in little gatherings where some people were usually missing. Christmas was always fun, especially when I got older and there were more little cousins running around.

Can you remember any stories you heard about your grandparents when they were children? Do you feel as if you knew much about their lives?

Not really. My grandmother grew up rather poor in West Virginia, the oldest daughter of a coal miner. She took care of her four younger siblings, and I don't know much more than that.

As a teenager, did you get along well with your parents, or was there trouble?

I got along with my parents okay, except when certain issues came up. I was always accused of being rebellious, simply because I had long hair and was outspoken in a family that wasn't hip to that. Everyone was expected to be non-descript and quiet and not attract attention to themselves, but I couldn't help it. They were supportive of my music, even though they couldn't help with it financially.

How about your brothers and sisters? Did you get along with them? Do you remember ever playing a trick on your brother or sister? What pictures come to mind when you think about playing together?

My brother and I got along okay. There were a lot of fights, but I don't think there were any more than in any other family. My sister and I didn't get along at all growing up. I felt she was spoiled and bratty, but things got better once we became adults.

Did someone in your family cause your folks more trouble than the rest?

Me, more often than not.

Have your pets been like family members, or just like animals? Did you ever have a dog that ran away? Try to list all the pets you've had through the years and their personalities.

We got a dog when I was 2, a collie named Lady. She lived till I was 15, but had heartworms and had to be put down She was very sweet and was like another mom to me and my brother and sister. She had lots of puppies, and her puppies have had lots of puppies. I know at least one family that still has one of her puppies, though he's probably ancient by now.

When Lady died, we got an orange cat creatively named Kitty. He was the runt of the litter, but quickly grew to epic proportions. He ran away quite a bit, especially when he was a kitten. My mom grew very fond of him, and stayed up all night waiting for him when he ran away. He had to be put to sleep a couple of months ago due to liver problems.

Did anyone in your family do handiwork? Needlework? Wood work? Was anyone particularly mechanical or artistic?

My mom crocheted a bit and played guitar, my stepdad was always rather handy around the house, being good with cars and home repair. He enjoyed leatherwork a long time ago, but hasn't shown any interest in it lately.

My dad and brother are particularly good with cars. My dad rebuilds them alot and even races them on ocassion. My brother is also very talented with computer hardware and stuff. My mom and my sister are very talented singers.

What did your dad do for a living? Your mom? Your grandparents?

My dad is a classic car restorer and race car driver. My mom is currently an accountant but has done computer systems and network administration in the past. My stepdad is a former police officer and is currently a security consultant.

Were you considered rich, poor, or middle class? Were times ever tough for all of you, or was it always smooth sailing? Did you have to go without things that your friends had?

We were middle class, I guess. Because there were alot of kids in the family, there were sacrifices. One of the biggest ones I remember was not being able to go to a special music school in the evenings because it was too far away and no one could drive me.

Were your parents fancy dressers? When you think of them, what do you remember them wearing? Did your mother wear a special perfume you remember? Did your father wear cologne or after-shave?

My parents dress up a bit for work, but not usually during their spare time. I don't remember associating a particular smell to my parents.

What was it like when you took your mate to meet your family? Were they welcoming or standoffish?

My mom was welcoming meeting Alisa. She was kind to her and tried making her feel comfortable. My stepdad was fine, just distant.

Was there one moment when you felt that your parents and siblings accepted your mate as a family member?

Pretty much from the first moment. That's a testimony to Alisa more than anything else.

What are the treasured pieces of furniture or family heirlooms that belonged to your parents or grandparents?

Not much. Lots of antique furniture, I guess. My parents love buying antiques, so they have a lot of those.

How did the Great Depression affect your family?

I'm not sure it did. None of my family back then were white-collar workers, they were poor anyway, so it didn't seem to matter.

When you think back on your mother and father now, what do you realize about their lives that you didn't understand when you were growing up?

That they're human being with needs and desires and psychological issues just like anyone else. They still was approval and to be loved and that their decisions when I was young were based on their own shortcomings rather than a malicious desire to ruin things.

Looking back, do you think your parents were happy with the circumstances of their lives?

Maybe not. They seemed to be stressed about money a lot, particularly my stepdad. Things seem to have gotten better.

Did your father have a favorite saying you can remember him repeating? Did your mother have a favorite saying you can remember her repeating?

I don't remember anything in particular. My stepdad seemed to enjoy southern colloquialisms sad in a fake southern accent, but who doesn't?

What memories would you like to share with your children or grandchildren that you never have before?

I guess I'd just love to have a big family that enjoys spending a lot of time together. I want to create memories and experiences wih my kids that don't revolve around television.

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The House of Your Growing Up

Do you have warm feelings about the childhood home that you remember the most?

I liked the vibe of it. Lots of fireplaces and stuff. The kitchen was awesome. It was huge and brick and felt warm all the time. It was dark red and brown. The living room was cool, too, with a big stone fireplace that went through to the other side, into my mom's office.

What did your home look like? Apartment, walk-up, condominium, or house? What was the color? Was it stone, wood - other? One story or two?

It was a brick two-story with bay windows on either side of the front door. It had a two-story deck on the back, so mine and my brother's bedroom had a glass door that went out on this deck. It was really cool watching the sun set from this deck.

What did you look out onto?

At first it looked out onto woods down below, but those woods eventually got turned into a shopping center and a WalMart. My friends and I used to walk down to that WalMart when it opened and buy random little junk.

What was your bedroom like?

It was big with wood paneled walls. My brother and I shared it, and we had our own bathroom and big closet. We had fun there, and got into plenty of fights there. I had a bunch of basketball posters and a Nerf basketball hoop, which lasted forever and saw a lot of games between my brother and I.

Did you share it with your siblings, or was it cozy by yourself?

Shared it with my brother, until we moved into a new house when I was 16 and I finally got a room to myself.

Can you remember the pictures that hung, wallpaper, carpeting, etc.? Can you remember your telephone number and address?

I remember thick carpet, with lots of paintings and antiques on the walls. The phone number is the same one my parents have to this day, and I do remember the address.

What did you do to make your room your own? Did you sleep with a stuffed animal or doll? What was your animal or doll's name?

I had lots of pictures that I drew and sports posters and stuff up on the walls. I'm not sure if I ever slept with it, but I did have a stuffed polar bear.

Can you remember what you daydreamed about in those days?

I remember listening to a lot of music, and it was in that house that I first started learning to play. I remember playing basketball in the backyard and pretending to be an NBA star.

What time did your mail come? Was it exciting anticipating the mail? Can you remember anything in particular that you received that was special?

I think our mail came in the early afternoon. I don't remember receiving much in the mail then, except for birthday cards from my grandparents which always had a little money in them.

Was security an issue? Did your parents keep the door locked or did family and friends come and go with the door unlocked?

My stepdad is a security consultant, so the doors were always locked if we weren't home, and we ocassionaly locked when we were there. Because the house didn't have central air conditioning, the doors were sometimes kept open in the summer, which meant there was usually a nice breeze there.

How old were you when you were first trusted with a key?

I guess I was about 11, right about the time my mom trusted that I was old enough to look after myself and my siblings after school.

Did your family eat at the kitchen table or in the dining room? What food conjures up the best childhood memories for you?

We ocassionally ate at the dining room table, but more often than not ate and watched the news.

No food in particular brings up any memories, except for just my mom's cooking in general. I remember lots of big Christmases and one Christmas we had a progressive dinner for the poeple at our church, and we decked the house out and lots of people came over for desserts.

What do you remember having in the refrigerator growing up? Could you graze freely or eat only at meal times?

I don't remember anything specific. We were allowed the ocassional snack, but were encouraged to eat only at mealtimes. Snacking was okay in moderation.

What was your parents' room like (beds, bedspreads, easy chairs, etc.)? Did you spend much time in their room with them? Were you allowed to rest in their bed when you were sick?

My parents' room was big, with two closets and a massive bathroom with a whirlpool tub. I never slept in there or anything, especially not when I was sick, but it was nice going in there to see them.

Was there much music in your house or was it relatively quiet? What type of music, if so? Did you play a Victrola, radio, record player, boom box, CDs?

My mom likes music, so there was music in the house sometimes, coming from a tape deck or a CD player depending on the year. My mom usually listened to Christian music or vocal music.

Was there a lot of talking going on? Did you feel part of the adult conversation?

I guess so. I was involved in adult conversation only inasmuch as it was my business. Otherwise, no.

Was there any place in your house that scared you (the basement, attic)?

The stairs down to the basement were frightening, because they were made of metal and were dangerous if they were damp, which in that basement was often. As far as being scared otherwise, not really.

Was there any place you felt was really "your spot," felt comfy alone or maybe a hiding spot in Hide'N Seek?

Maybe not for hiding, but the deck off of my room was always a nice spot for relaxing and listening to music, especially on a nice evening. Because it was on the second floor, it gaveme a nice view over the backyard and the busy street down below.

Did you have a lawn? Have to mow it? Did you have gardens of flowers, vegetables or herbs? Did you help care for them?

I definately mowed the lawn. Every weekend in the summer. I lived for the day in fall when my parents would decide that yardwork was done for the year. We lived on a big lot, so there was a lot of grass to mow. My dad had a garden one year, mostly with tomatoes.

What kind of chores were you required to do for the family?

After school we had a list of chores for cleaning the house. Nothing crazy, just little things to help out. Saturdays, I wasn't allowed to watch TV or play with my friends until my room was clean and anything my mom needed me to do was done. I typically cleaned my room on Friday nights so I could go play with my friends sooner on Saturday mornings.

What was your favorite season at your house? Do you remember summer as too hot or exhilarating and perfect? Did you swim a lot in the summer? Did you ski or do winter sports in the cold weather?

I think my favorite season was fall. We had a lot of trees in the yard that had changing leaves, so it was always pretty. It always felt nice outside then. The summer's were warm, especially without central air. My brother and I used to sleep on the floor in front of a fan in the glass door in our room if it was a particularly hot night. We swam some in the summer, at a city pool, but I never went skiing or anything in winter. We did sled a lot, because there were lots of hills nearby, including a golf course that was perfect.

Were there books in evidence around your house? Was there a special room in the house considered the "library"? Which of your parents' books and magazines do you remember reading?

My mom's office had lots of books, usually reference books. My mom read Better Homes and Garden and Ladies Home Journal on ocassion, and I remember glancing at those every once in a while.

Were you or your parents interested in the news? Which news stories made the greatest impression on you?

We usually watched the news as we ate dinner. They seemed interested, though I think I was more interested. I don't remember any news story in particular, except for following presidential races and stuff.

Where were the telephones in your home? Were you allowed to stay on the phone as long as you wanted or was there a time limit?

There was a phone in the kitchen, living room, and my parents' bedroom. I could talk on the phone if I wanted, but I don't remember wanting to for too long.

Which door did you use mostly? Front door, back door, kitchen door, side door? Was there usually someone there to greet you when you came home?

We used either the front door or the garage door the most. The garage door led to the kitchen, which is where I always seemed to migrate anyway. My mom was sometimes home, but usually it was just the kids till about 4 or 5pm.

What time did you usually eat dinner? Was the family all together?

We usually ate around 6 or 6:30, depending on when my mom got home and how long it took her to cook. We usually ate together.

Were you proud of your house or shy about having friends over?

The house was old, but huge, so my friends seemed to like it. It didn't have some of the amenities that others did, but it was nice a big and pretty.

Did your parents have friends over often? Can you remember them having parties? Where did everyone gather? Did company come often for meals?

My parents had people over every once in a while. Not a lot, and I don't remember them staying for meals very often. They were usually church friends.

What time of the night do you remember your house getting quiet and preparing for sleep?

The house was usually getting quiet around 9 or 10 and I was usually asleep shortly thereafter.

Did relatives or boarders live with your family? What were their quarters like? Were you allowed in there?

My parents took two different girls in on two seperate ocassions, after the girls were having issues with their parents. They didn't stay long, but they were nice and we enjoyed having them.

Do you remember your house having a particular scent (cooking smells, aroma of flowers, laundry scents)?

Not really. There was always the smell of food around dinnertime. The only other smell I distinctly remember was the smell of cast-iron from the woodstove.

What was the street like where you lived? Did you have a front stoop or porch? Informal or formal?

We had a very small front porch, nothing big enough to sit on. The house was on a dirt road, and there were three or four houses on that same street. We were friendly with our neighbors, but never got to know them well.

Can you remember excitement about a certain purchase (washing machine, phone, addition to the house) or repairs to the house?

I remember getting cable TV when I was about 15. I couldn't believe we hadn't had it till then. All of my friends did. I enjoyed watching MacGyver reruns everyday at 4 when I got home from school.

If you could now move back into the house you grew up in, just the way it was then, would you? Why or why not?

Probably not. It was so old, that it wasn't in the best shape. There was a lot of room downstairs, but the layout was weird. The upstairs was not as roomy.

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Childhood/Neighborhood

Who were your best friends in your neighborhood? Do you still know them or know what happened to them?

I had two best friends, both also named Jason. One was Jason Lewis, who was cool, but kind of a troublemaker. I think our mom's had to get together to talk about stuff quite a bit. The other one was Jason Perdue, and his parents liked me and mine liked him. We had a lot of fun, never really getting into trouble. He was into sports, especially baseball, so we played a lot outside. The three of us played videogames on ocassion, too. I haven't heard anything about them since high school.

Did you play at your home, theirs or mostly in playgrounds, the streets, fields?

We split our time between our houses. When weweren't playing at home, we went to an athletic complex and played there, sports and stuff. We had a Saturyda morning football game we played for a long time in middle school, with a lot of our classmates from the neighborhood, and it was always friendly and fun.

What do you remember about your friends' houses and families?

I remember their families being nice to me, having me over for dinner and to spend the night. Their houses were usually smaller, but cozy and comfortable. They had younger siblings, too, so there were always lots of toys for the younger kids around the house. We typically played in the yard or in the basement.

Did you have a secret path you used to take to meet your friend?

Not really. Just right down the main road we lived on. Their houses were a mile or so up the road from mine, so it was never too far to walk or anything.

Did you play house? Were you the mother, father, doctor, etc? Did you play stickball, ice skate, play basketball or baseball (what position did you play)? Did you go to the library?

We played basketball in my backyard, or football or basball at a friend's house. There weren't enough of us to play particular positions, just kind free for all. I went to the library a lot, but typically with my family, not my friends.

Was there a neighborhood bully? Did that bully ever hurt you?

No bully to speak of. There were mean guys in school, but none of them lived in my neighborhood.

Did you have a nickname? How did you get it? Has it stuck with you?

Because my two best friends were also named Jason, I went by Windsor a lot, which got resurrected in college and has stuck since, due to the large number of Jasons around.

What sidewalk games did you play? Did you collect anything (bugs, baseball cards, marbles, etc.)?

I collected baseball cards and comic books a little. There was a comic shop nearby, and it seemed fun. The gas station near my house had lots of baseball cards and candy, so I was there a lot.

Did you have pets? What were their names? Were they usually strays? How did you acquire them?

A dog, and then a cat. The dog was named Lady and the cat was named Kitty. They were given to us by friends.

Do you remember having the chicken pox, mumps or other childhood diseases? Were you ever seriously ill as a child? Who took care of you?

I know I had chicken pox at one point, but I don't remember it. I do remember getting my appendix taken out when I was 16, and being in bed for a week from that. My mom stayed home one day, and the rest of the week I took care of myself.

How did you go downtown and get back home? Trolley, bus, car, horseback, walk? Can you remember your first trip? Why did you usually go?

Um, my mom drove us around alot. We didn't really have a downtown. We did go to Greensboro on ocassion, for shopping or to visit friends.

Did you ever have a natural disaster in your town like a tornado, flood, or immobilizing snow storm?

When I was 15, we had a big snowstorm that knocked out power to our house for 4 days. School was cancelled, and no one could get to work, so my family staying in. Since our house didn't have central heating, we were okay without the power because we typically used the woodstave and kerosene heaters for warmth. That winter, when we were snowed in, my stepdad and I ventured out to go to the store, and that was an adventure. My mom made a big pot of beef stew on top of the kerosene heater, and the five of us ate that the whole time. It was actually a lot of fun.

Describe your neighborhood - rural or suburban? Lots of grass or concrete? Did anyone have fancy gardens, a horse, or something "different" from the norm?

Very woodsy, old neighborhood. I would classify it as suburban, simply because there weren't cookie-cutter houses or anything. I liked it.

Do you remember a new family moving into your neighborhood? Did your family welcome them by sending food; were they hard to get to know; did they join your circle of friends?

Not really. I remember the neighbors bringing us food when we first moved in, which was nice of them.

What were your favorite board games?

I liked Monopoly and Trivial Pursuit and Scrabble and stuff. We played a game called Stratego a lot in my house and it became a big contest between everyone in my family.

Did you ever go door-to-door selling anything to your neighbors? Did you have a lemonade stand?

I tried selling the fund-raiser stuff, but it was too much of a hassle. I'm not a fan of making kids do that.

Would you like to have raised your children in a neighborhood like the one you grew up in? Why or why not?

I guess so. There weren't that many kids in my neighborhood, and I never really got the know the neighbors. I'd like to live somewhere where the neighbors know each other and are friendly.

Did you have any imaginary friends growing up? Did your parents play along?

I did when I was very young, like 5 or 6. I don't remember my parents ever knowing about it.

Were you afraid of the boogeyman or the monster under the bed?

Um, not really.

What were your favorite books, poems or bedtime stories as a child?

I liked a lot of books when I was a kid, like A Seperate Peace, or the Dakota King books.

Did you go to camp? Did anyone from your neighborhood go with you? Do you remember any of the counselors or groups of kids? What did you do at camp?

I went to boy scout camp one year. It was a weeklong summer camp and seemed to go on forever. We stayed in musty tents and did lots of activities. I participated in the mile swim, training every day until the last day, when I finally swam an entire mile with some other boys. That was cool. Toward the end of camp, some older kids incited a fight between me and my best friend. We fought, and we were disciplined, but when the leaders found out what happened, the older boys were sent home.

What did you ever do that got you into trouble with your parents? At school? What were the punishments?

I wasn't good at doing homework, so I was typically punished for that. I wasn't really a fighter or anything. Punishment usually meant being grounded or not being allowed to watch TV.

Did you attend a religious school? Did you bring those values with you into adulthood?

I attended a normal public school.

Was your neighborhood a good, safe place in which to take walks? Do you remember any incidences?

It was nice. I don't remember anything bad happening there, though it's possible something did.

Did you ever want to run away? Why?

I wanted to run away often. Usually from feeling like my parents didn't understand me. Normal angst stuff I guess. I never ran away.

What was a perfect day when you were a child?

I guess just lots of outdoor activities and games with my friends, maybe later going to see a movie and having pizza and ice cream with a bunch of friends.

What is your first memory?

I think my first sort of photograph in my head was of a gas pump on the road my parents lived on in Florida. I told my mom about it a couple of years ago and she freaked because I was only like 2 when we were last there.

What were the names of neighborhood landmarks? The ice cream store? Drugstore? Barber shop? Grocery store? Flower shop? Shoe repair shop? What do you remember most vividly about them?

I only really remember the gas station nearby, and maybe the hobby shops. I do remember hanging out at PuttPutt with my friends on a Saturday and playing video games.

Now that you are an adult, what advice would you give to a child about childhood?

Learn to work hard and play hard now because it's tougher to learn when you get older.

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Elementary School Years

What was the name of your school? How big was it? What did it look like? Was it a private or public school?

I went to several elementary schools, but the one I finished at was called Shadybrook. I was only there for the last 4 months of 5th grade, but I liked it okay. It wasn't particularly large, and was just a single story brick building. It was a public school.

Did you ride a bus to school? If so, did you like riding the bus? Do you remember anything that happened on that bus?

No, I walked to elementary school. We only lived like a mile from the school, and if it rained, my mom drove us.

What did you learn in school that you still use to this day?

Um, don't wait till the last minute to work on your science project?

Do you remember being afraid to enter first grade? What did you think when you first saw the classroom?

First grade. I honestly don't remember. I don't think I was afraid. The school I had been to before had kindergarten for 4 year olds and 5 years olds, so I had been in school for two years prior to first grade.

Do remember "getting" a concept? Cursive writing, maybe? Do you remember the moment when you realized you could read? Was school work hard or easy for you?

School work was easy for me, I guess. I can't remember a time when I couldn't read. The earliest memory I have of actually reading anything, I was three years old.

Did you like physical education / gym class? Did you feel you were good at sports? Were you picked first or last for the teams?

I was pretty tall for my age, so I remember getting picked pretty close to first in elementary school. I enjoyed gym class, if only because it was a nice break from class.

Do you remember shopping for school clothes? Getting excited at what you would wear the first few weeks? Did you ever go to school where you wore a uniform?

I never to a school that required a uniform. I remember being into like surfer and skater t-shirts, and I remember getting a pair of parachute pants, made of this weird canvas with tons of pockets.

Did you eat lunch at school or go home? Did you bring your own lunch? Did you have a lunchbox? If so, what did it look like?

I think I took my lunch a couple of times, but I remember eating at school more often than not. I think at one point I had a Dukes of Hazzard lunch box. I was all about the Dukes when I was a kid.

How did you get to school...walk alone, with friends, bus, parent, neighbor?

I walked with my brother if the weather was okay. I remember it sucking quite a bit. It was a long walk, over a mile, each way. I'm sure it did me a lot of good, it just sucked having to walk home after a long school day.

What did you do in the summertime when there was no school?

Played GI Joe a lot, I think, usually with my friends. A lot of my friends lived nearby, so there was always someone to play with.

What was your first grade teacher's name? Were you in awe of her? How about your second grade teacher or third grade teacher...or others?

I can't remember my first grade teachers name. I do remember my kindergarten teachers, Ms. Fleming and Ms. Brandenburg. They were both very pretty, and were probably only 22 or 23 years old at the time. I had lots of different teachers in elementary school from moving so much.

Do you remember any visitors that came to your classroom like the mayor, an actor, a cowboy star?

Um, not really.

Do you remember any field trips your class took? If you lived in the city, did you go to a farm, factory, big museum?

We went to see an exhibit on Rameses the Great, and they had all of his stuff that they found in the pyramid and he himself was there, encased in glass. It was the only time I've ever seen a dead body. That body just happened to be 3000 years old.

Did you say the "Pledge of Allegiance" to start the day? Did you say a prayer? How did you feel about those topics as a child?

We said the Pledge of Allegiance every day. I don't remember having an opinion on it. We didn't pray, since I went to public school and that was pretty much not allowed.

Were you ever the new kid in school?

Often. I remember changing schools mid-year a couple of times. I don't remember it being traumatic or anything. I just remember liking meeting new pretty girls. Some things never change.

Did you win awards at school? Were you ever a star in music?

I won spelling bees and stuff. I didn't really excel in music until middle school.

Who was your best friend in elementary school?

For a long time is was a kid named Benji. When I moved in the fifth grade, the two Jasons became my friends.

Do you remember the names of any school books? Do you remember the illustrations in them?

Not at all.

Did you have a hobby during those years? Did you ice skate, build things or perform magic, etc.? Did your school mates know about it or did you keep it to yourself?

I actually did get into magic. I have no idea why. I would bring a magic set to school on show and tell day sometimes. I liked it a lot, and in some ways, still do.

Were you in a scout troop or any other organization? Do you remember the leader? Any projects? Any impressions?

I was a Cub Scout and Boy Scout. The stepdad was my Scoutmaster, and it was a lot of fun, though a lot of it was taken a little too seriously.

Who was the principal at your elementary school? Were you ever called to the principal's office? If so, why?

I don't remember any of their names. I remember being sent there once, and was told that I would be spanked. The rumors of paddles with nails in them were industry standard at my school, so I was bawling my eyes out. I hav no idea to this day what I did, but I don't think I was actually guilty of it. I sat in the waiting room at the principal's office and he never showed up. He was off-campus somewhere, so I never got that spanking.

What did you think of the older kids? Did they seem sophisticated to you? Were they doing some activity that you just could hardly wait to do?

I don't remember having any opinion of the older kids.

What was your attitude about school? Were you excited about it, bored or just tolerated it?

I think I was bored a lot. I was enrolled in gifted classes starting in first grade, all the way through high school. Those classes were fun, because they seemed to be more about creativity and stuff.

Do you remember kindergarten? What do you remember?

I remember alot more about kindergarten than first through fifth grades, actually. I was enrolled at a small Christian Academy that was part of my church. It was actually rather big. I remember in K4 watching Seseme Street everyday, and in K5 we learned about dinosaurs, which was probably my favorite topic till fifth grade.

Did you have any friends who went with you all the way from elementary school through high school? Are they still your friends?

A lot of the kids in my fifth grade class went to a different middle school, but we all came back to the same high school. We were all friends through till graduation. I remember being shorter than some of the girls in elementary school, but shooting past them by high school.

Did you have a favorite teacher?

I guess the two teachers I had in kindergarten were my favorites. My K4 teacher was a family friend and taught me and my brother and sister, and I see her around every once in a while. I think it freaks her out that I'm so old.

Do you ever remember your mother coming to your school for any reason? What was the usual punishment at your school for wrongdoing?

Spanking hadn't been phased out yet, so that was done every once in a while. I never got spanked, but some really bad kids did. Every oncei n a while my mom would bring me a Happy Meal to school for lunch, if she wasn't busy. Otherwise she just came to get me if I was sick, or she and my grandparents would come and bring cake for all the kids on my birthday.

Do you remember having to stand up in front of the class to read a paper or a story?

I don't remember really doing that until middle school.

Can you remember a historic event that happened when you were in school?

When I was in second grade, the Challenger blew up. My teacher was reading a story to us when a janitor came in and whispered to her what happened. We all went to the library to watch the news.

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Life in a Small Town

What was the name, state and population of your town?

I lived in several. I lived for the lognest in High Point, NC, population ~150,000.

What was the main source of the town's income?

Furniture. High Point is the furniture capital of the world.

Did you have the pride of having a farm or business handed down from generation to generation?

Not really.

What types of food were generally considered for dinner time? Have you raised your family with the same types of foods?

My mom was a good cook, and made american family favorites, I guess. Meatloaf and stews and stuff. I always liked her cooking.

If you lived on a farm, what was the week like? What was Sunday like?

I didn't really live on a farm, though I did live on a couple of ocassions deep in the country. I remember it being excruciatingly boring.

How did friendships differ from rural life vs large city life (if you have experienced both)?

I had more friends in the city, and there was always more to do. In the country, you're sort of forced to be friends with whoever is close by, and there was a kid I was friends with in the country who I got along with well, but I don't think he was a good influence on me. In the city, you could pick your friends more carefully, and I went frm having one friend that lived nearby to lots of friends nearby, and friends that I had more in common with.

Did you ever dream of leaving your small town?

Constantly. There was nothing to do, except on the rare ocassion that my mom would take us to Putt-Putt or bowling. I was very boring living in the country, and you kind of had to make your own fun. We had a basketball hoop, so I remember playing basketball a lot.

What invention came last to rural areas from the cities?

Um, not sure. We got a VCR pretty late in the game, and we never had cable, though most people in the city did.

What did you raise on your farm? How large was it? How many acres? How many buildings? How did things change seasonally?

We never had a farm, we just lived in the country.

Did you ever raise an animal and show it at a fair? Did you have to sell it? How did you feel about that?

Um, no.

What animals did you witness giving birth? Were they vet-assisted, or did the family hold the vigil? What do you remember about your veterinarian?

Our dog had puppies alot. One litter was born on my bedroom floor while I was at school. I remember it being really gross and messy.

Who were your neighbors? Did the neighbors form a tight community? Did you ever have to help out in an emergency?

Our neighbors in the country were nice. One nearby family had a daughter that was a horrible influence on my sister, and her parents weren't very nice to my parents, so there was tension there. Otherwise, everyone helped each other out.

What are some of the biggest differences between living in a small town and a big city? Pros and cons?

I never really liked the small town. The only pros I think would that there was always lots of room to play. Lots of woods to get lost in. But it was pretty boring most of the time.

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Holidays and Celebrations

Do you like your birthday or dread it? What birthday do you remember the most?

I always liked my birthday. My brother's birthday is the week after mine, so we ended up sharing parties and stuff a lot. That actually hasn't changed a bit. I remember getting a Dukes of Hazzard cake when I was five, and my grandfather dressed like a clown and came to my school.

Did you get to choose the meal on your birthday? Were birthdays considered a "big deal" when you were young? Did you raise your children to think they were a big deal?

I always got to pick the meal on my birthday. It was usually something italian, like lasagna or pizza. Birthdays weren;t huge when I was a kid, but I think I would've hated the attention. I don't like making a big deal out of my birthday today.

Did your family make birthday cakes or did you buy them? What were the favorite flavors? What kind of birthday parties did you give for your children?

Since my grandparents owned a Baskin-Robbins, I always got an ice cream cake as a kid.

What were the most important religious holidays you celebrated throughout the year? What was the significance of the holiday (i.e., why were you celebrating it)?

Thanksgiving and Christmas we always big. Easter was usually fun, with easter egg hunts and stuff.

How did you celebrate each major holiday?

Usually by getting family together and having a nice meal.

What holiday did you especially like? Which holiday was really not much fun for you?

I always liked Christmas, for obvious reasons. I don't remember any not fun holiday.

What were some of the best memories from any of the holidays you celebrated?

I guess just getting to spend time with my family, even though I was usually sick of them within five minutes.

What was served at your holiday dinners? What do you remember about these dinners?

Typical turkey and ham and typical sides. Nothing ground-breaking.

What are some of your memorable birthdays from your life? Were any birthdays particularly difficult because you reached a certain numerical age?

Haven't we been through this already?

Is there a holiday present or birthday present that especially sticks out in your mind?

I remember my uncle Scott giving me a pocketknife once. I remember that being the best present that year, until the next year when I got a BB gun from my dad. I was building up quite the arsenal.

How did you celebrate New Year's Day?

Usually with friends, hanging out or playing games.

How did you celebrate Valentine's Day? Did you and your schoolmates exchange Valentine's in elementary school? What was the best Valentine's Day for you and why?

We always exchanged valentines at school. I remember it being nerve-wracking wanting to get a nice one from a girl you liked.

Did you ever get flowers or candy for Valentine's Day? Any other unique present on that day? Do you still send and receive Valentine's card to this day?

Sometimes. It's nice to have a valentine.

How did you celebrate Easter or Passover?

Usually with dressing up for church and hiding easter eggs.

Did anyone ever dress up like the Easter Bunny to surprise your children? Was church in your schedule at Easter? Did you color Easter eggs?

No. Yes. Yes.

Was Mother's Day an important day? How did you typically celebrate it?

I usually got a card or something for my mom, and helped more around the house so she wouldn't have to do anything.

How about Memorial Day? What did Memorial Day mean to you and your family?

Um, just another day off from school.

Was Father's Day an important day? How did you typically celebrate it?

Usually getting something for my dad and stepdad.

As a child, what did you do on the Fourth of July? What do you do now?

We usually went to watch fireworks. Last year I went to a basball game with my girlfriend and some friends of ours. It was a lot of fun.

Labor Day signified the end of summer. What were some of the best Labor Day weekends you experienced?

Usually going to the beach and whatnot.

Do you like Halloween? What have you gone dressed up as? Did your parents make your costume or did they buy them? What was Halloween like growing up? Do you remember the pals you Trick-Or-Treated with?

I liked it okay when I was a kid. My parents bought me a couple of costumes when I was very young, but as I got older, I tried making my own costumes. They were pretty pathetic.

What Halloween candy do you pass out?

I like passing out chocolates. I think kids like chocolates more than other types. Also, if there's any left over, I like chocolates, too. Everybody wins.

What did you usually do on Thanksgiving in your youth? What do you do now?

Then? Eat. Now? Eat.

What do you do on New Year's Eve normally? What was the fanciest New Year's Eve party you ever attended?

I've stayed home the last couple of times, but I look forward to going out again for New Year's. The fanciest New Year's I attended was in Nashville when I was 15. It was a black tie event with a big band and stuff and was a lot of fun.

Do you remember a holiday you had to spend alone? Which was the best holiday of your life? The worst?

I spent Thanksgiving alone one year. It pretty much sucked. My roommate brought me a plate from his parents and it was pretty good. Maybe not the best holiday, but certainly a good one, was going to have Thanksgiving at my friend Kent's house. We spent the week going to his old hangouts and spending time with our other friends that lived in the area. It was relaxing and we had a blast.

Any advice to a new parent about celebrating the holidays? Any regrets?

Um, no.

And, no.

What did Christmas morning feel like when you were a child? Was it hard getting to sleep the night before? What are some of your holiday religious rites and traditions?

I was usually up pretty early. I did usually stay up late the night before, but I was always up and out of bed the moment I was awake.

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High School

Where did you go to high school? What was your mascot? What were your school colors? Do you remember any of the cheers? What was your favorite song during high school? What type of music was popular?

I went to Andrews High School in High Point, NC. Our mascot was the Red Raider, basically one of those stereotypical Indian mascots. Our school colors were red and white. I remember liking a lot of Dave Matthews and Phish. Alternative was probably the most popular in music on my high school.

Who were your friends? What did you like about them? Who were your favorite teachers?

Probably my best friend in high school was Danny. We both played a lot of music together and hung out a lot. I had lots of other friends too, but I didn't spend a lot of time with them out side of school. My two favorite teachers were Dr. Arnold and Mr. Shaver. They both challenged me quite a bit and shared alot of their lives with us.

What kind of extra-curricular activities did you do in high school? Were you on the school paper? A sports team? Were you a class officer? A cheerleader? A nerd? Were your friends involved in the same activities as you were?

I did a lot of music stuff and debate stuff. Most of my friends were involved in that, too.

Were you ever honored at school? Varsity letter? Homecoming court? Valedictorian? Do you remember the students who were?

I was a member of the National Honor Society and Beta Club. I lettered in academics.

Do you remember any students you felt sorry for because other students made fun of them or took advantage of them?

Everyone at my school got along pretty well. We were all basically middle-class, so there wasn't a lot of tension in the school.

Were you a diligent student or did you have a more casual approach?

I never did any homework. Ever. I was constantly in trouble for that. My grades were good, only because it was a public school. I wish I had learned better studying skills, since I think I could have gone farther in college if I had.

Did you study a foreign language? Did those lessons stick with you? Were you ever able to use that language on vacation or in your community?

I studied French and became quite good at it. I can still hang in a conversation. I used it a year or so ago when I was in a car accident with an African man who spoke French.

Did science or math come hard to you? Did art or English come easily? Do you remember any long papers you wrote or any special projects?

None of the subjects were particularly hard for me. I wrote an occassional paper, but nothing that I can really remember.

Who did you go to your prom with? What did you wear? Did you dance much?

I only went to prom with friends. I dressed up a bit, but nothing special. I never dance.

Were you a beatnik, hippie or rebel?

Yes, yes, and yes.

Did you have hobbies, read a lot, enjoy political debates, bands, or just hanging out with your friends? Did you have a part time job? Did you babysit? Did you do volunteer your time?

I read some, mostly listened to music and hung out with friends. I played a lot of music and stuff, but kept the political debates localized to debate class. I worked a lot in high school, at a couple of grocery stores and restaurants.

Were you popular? If not, did it bother you? Did you buy a class ring? Was it a big expense for you?

I was moderately popular. I'm much more popular now that I don't care what people think. I did not buy a class ring, and generally felt sorry for people who did. Especially those that still wear them.

Where did your crowd hang out? Did you go to a diner, drugstore, library, friends' houses, etc.?

We hung out in each other's basements, playing music and stuff. Late at night, if we were hungry, we went to a diner called Alex's House. We were there a lot of late nights/early mornings. The food was horrible, but we didn't know any better.

What were the clothing trends when you were in high school? Did you follow the trends?

The trends were mostly grunge rock clothes, like flannels and stuff when I started, gravitating to a hippie revival style toward the end. I tried staying trendy, but size and money usually got in the way.

Who was your principal? Who was your gym teacher? Coaches? Did you spend much time at the library? Was homework easy for you?

Mr. Hairston was the principal. I didn't really interact with him a lot, but he knew who I was. I had a couple of gym teachers, most of whom are in prison now for various crimes, mostly invovling drugs. I spent the last period of every day of spring semester senior year in the library with my friend Pete. We just goofed off. I had to take a Freshman science class that I neglected to take as a Freshman, so I went from Fall Semester college-level Physics to Freshman level Earth Science spring semester. The teacher saw no reason for me to be in class, only making me show up for the tests, which I always did well on. I couldn't leave school, so I just went to the library and hung out with my friend, who was in a similar situation.

Did your parents like your friends? Were you happy in high school?

My parents liked my friends okay. They didn't interact with them alot. I was generally happy in high school.

Were you in a clique or sorority? Was it a good decision?

I wouldn't say I was in a clique. My school didn't really have cliques.

Did you ever skip school? Where did you usually go after school? Did you do homework after school? Did you work in high school? Did you ever get disciplined in high school?

I skipped classes on occassion. Danny and I would go get breakfast during first period. I took sick days occassionally to go hang out at a friends house.

I've answered the rest of these questions.

How did you usually spend your weekends? Did you do chores around the house? Did you spend more time at one friend's house than anybody else's? At whose house did people gather? How did their parents like having all the kids around?

Did some chores, mostly yardwork. Spent a lot of time playing and learning music, trying to play in clubs and stuff.

What did you discover about yourself in high school? Did you learn a skill that you could take out in the world with you? Were you sad when it ended, or were you ready to leave it all behind?

I was ready to leave. I was anxious to start college and begin a lofe on my own. In high school I came out of my shell big time. I started very shy and ended much more comfortable with myself.

Were you philosophical - a deep thinker?

I guess. I took my spirituality very seriously.

Have you ever attended a high school reunion? What truths did you learn about your classmates, if you attended? What truths about your community that you might not have thought about before?

My high school reunion is coming up, but I don't think I'm going to go.

How important were your high school years in your life? Do you ever dream about those years? If you could have one conversation now with yourself when you were a high school student, what would you say?

They were fairly important. The years after were much more so. I would tell my high school self to study more. My twenties might have been easier if I had.

How would the young adult you were view the person you've become?

I think my high school self would admire my current self, but just wish I made more money.

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College

If you went to college, where did you go? Why did you choose that school? How much was tuition? Was it difficult to afford? Did you receive financial assistance or a scholarship? A loan? Was your school large or small? What was it known for?

UNC-Greensboro. It was close and they offered me a scholarship/ Tuition wasn't expensive, and I could afford some of it. The school is medium size, and is most known for business, music, and english.

What was your living situation? Did you live in a dorm or a room off campus? Who was your roommate? Did you get along? How did you decorate your place? Were you comfortable there?

I lived at home the first year and in a student apartment second year. I had a couple of roommates. I got along with them okay. The apartment was awful It was tiny and very expensive.

What was your major? Why did you pick it? Were you ever able to use anything you learned in college in real life? Did you change colleges or majors partway through? Why?

I triple-majored in music, religion, and english. I learned nothing in classes in college that helps me today.

Did you join a sorority or fraternity? Was it important to you?

No, Greek life wasn't huge on my campus.

When you first got to college, were you thrilled to be away from home? If you were homesick, what did you do about it? Write letters? Cry? Confide in someone? Or try to hide your feelings? If you were thrilled to be at college, were you quick at making friends? Who was your first friend there? Did you remain close through the years?

I was thrilled to be at college. Probably my first friends were Dan and Graham. I actually met them before starting college, only two weeks after I graduated high school, at a concert near where I lived. Dan was in the audience, and we chatted a bit, because we both had big poofy hair. I remember acking him if we were going to start a mosh pit. For some reason I thought this was the coolest thing I could possibly say, and he looked at me like I was stupid. If I hadn't gotten up the courage to ask him that, however, I probably wouldn't have become friends with him. We exchanged names but that was it, and we left the concert not expecting to see each other again. Three months later, I was walking across the street, going to class, and he was walking toward me. We both laughed that we caught up with each other and have been friends ever ysince.

Graham was actually playing bongos in the band that opened for the main band. He and I reconnected my freshman year of college, too. I admired him a lot and was very pleased to get to know him better and become close to him.

Were you on any sports teams? If not, did you follow them? Were any of your teams champions or near-champs?

No. Not really a sports school.

Was there any professor who made a special impression on you? Good or bad? What subject did he or she teach? Were you able to take more than one class from this person? Did he or she ever make a comment about your work that stuck in your memory?

Not really. My profs seemed disinterested in teaching anything.

Why was it important for you to go to college? Was it an expected step in your community, or were you the first in your family to go for a degree? What motivated you most? Love of learning, or just getting through?

I wanted to go to learn more specialized things, like music. It was important to me to go and be challenged. My parents never made me feel like I had to go, but they definately wanted me too.

Were you able to get home for the holidays? What do you remember about going home once you began college?

Well, I lived at home freshman year, so I went home every evening.

Did you change much at college? Did your parents notice? Did you friends back home notice? Did they mention it to you?

I changed a tremendous amount at college. My parents noticed a bit, but only because I usually kept that stuff to myself.

What define college life during the years you were there? Did you go to coffee houses? Did you attend poetry jams?

Intervarsity defined it for me. I met a lot of friends there. We did spend a lot of time at Tate Street Coffeehouse, since it was so close to campus. I spent a lot of time there alone in the mornings and it was really nice.

Did you remain friendly with anyone you met at college? Did you visit each other over the years? Did you keep in touch by letter before affordable long distance and e-mail?

I'm still friendly with almost everyone I met in college. We still visit each other quite a bit.

Did you have a number of casual love interests or one special person throughout college? How did this experience change you?

I had a number of casual love interests. That number was huge. I did learn a lot, mostly about how men and women should interact when trying to woo each other. The moment I learned it, I put it to work for me.

Was your class work difficult or easy for you? What were your study habits? Did you pull all-nighters? Did you cram with friends, or work alone?

I rarely did homework and missed a lot of class. I want to go back and I think if I did, that I will work a lot harder.

Were you involved in campus politics? What issues "impassioned" you? Did you protest? How did you feel about politics during your college years?

Not really.

Did you have a part-time job while you were in school? If yes, what did you do? If no, why not?

Yes. I worked security and worked in the library on campus.

What did you notice about students from other parts of the country? Accents? Different taste in clothing? Religious differences? More conservative or liberal ideas? Did you learn to be more tolerant? Do you have an example of how you learned to be more tolerant?

I guess I just learned how different people are depending on where they're from, even if they're the same race as you and share the same economics.

Was there one class that particularly inspired you? Was there one that felt just impossible?

I liked my music classes a lot. The only one that felt impossoble was my english lit class, because there was just so much reading involved.

Did any famous performers or lecturers appear at your college? Who were some famous graduates from your school? Anyone you could tell would be a big success even then?

None that I remember.

Did you graduate from college? What degree did you get? Did you attend graduation? Did you win any accolades at college? Phi Beta Kappa? Valedictorian? Magna cum laude?

I didn't graduate. I attended two graduations, one for my friends Graham and Lee, and one for my friend Kevin.

Do you think you made the most of your college years, or would it have been more advantageous for you to have gone to school later on?

I think I would have gotten more out of school academically had I gone later, but I got so much personally from my friends, and that wouldn't have been possible had I gone later when I had more responsibilities.

Which do you have fonder memories of - college or high school?

Just spending time with friends, which I did a lot.

Did college ever start to feel like home to you? Or was it always just a stopping-off place?

It still feels like home in a lot of ways, but less so since all of my friends have left.

Did your friends back home who didn't go to college treat you differently when you came home for holidays or the summer? How did it make you feel?

Not really. I didn't see them much.

Were you the same person when you got out of college as when you entered as a freshman?

Absolutely not. College was a time for all of my worse tendencies to come out and get dealt with. It was painful, but I know I'm better for it.

Have you ever been to a college reunion? Was it fun, or sort of sad? Did you see anyone there whom you were surprised and happy to see? Anyone you did not care to see?

Not really. Nothingformal anyway. We all try to get together as often as possible.

Did you attend any kind of graduate school? Please share your graduate school experience.

No.

Is there anything else you would like to add about your college years? Any advice you would like to give to someone just starting out?

Work to balance spending time with new friends with doing your homework. There will always be time to hang out.

---

Entertainment

What was your favorite radio or television show growing up?

Oh gosh. When I was really small it was probably the Dukes of Hazzard. I think MacGyver became my favorite later, until about high school, when I think Mad About You and Friends were my favorites.

Did you ever go to see your favorite performers in concert when you were young? Who were they?

Yeah, my dad took me a lot, and I went to a ton of concerts in high school. Phish and DMB and Widespread Panic and Medeski Martin & Wood. You name it.

What radio stations do you listen to now? What talk radio shows do you like? Have you ever called a talk-radio host and had your voice go on the air?

I listen to classic rock some and top 40 some now, but mostly I listen to CDs or my iPod. I like some talk radio shows, like Prairie Home Companion and Car Talk.

What television programs do you watch now? What are the shows that you really enjoyed through the years?

I watch Scrubs and Lost a lot now. Not a whole lot else religiously.

Have your tastes in entertainment been fairly mainstream, or have you gone for more unusual music or cinema? Do you like jazz or foreign films? Do you go to poetry readings?

I go through phases where I like mainstream stuff, then back to underground, then back to mainstream. I do like foreign film and jazz, anything that remids me of being in a coffeeshop.

What kinds of artistic outlets have your undertaken in your life? Poetry writing? Photography? Painting? Piano playing? Ballet?

Mostly music. I'd like to get into photography and learn more about design.

If you could be anything having to do with the cultural arts or entertainment, what would you have done? Have you ever appeared in theater or in a civic organization's show?

I'd love to play music professionally, but it would be difficult to be in that life. I'd like to be in some sort of creative business on a more backstage level.

What is your preference in music? Do you follow current music or do you prefer the old? Do you like music on in the house or silence? What are your most favorite songs? Make the list as long or as short as you would like!

I like more folky music. More acoustic but complex styles. My favorite song of all time is Big Country by Bela Fleck and Edgar Meyer.

When did you get your first television? Was it bought so your family could view a special show or event? What room did you put it in? How much did it cost? Was your family one of the first in your neighborhood to have a TV?

We had a television for as long as I can remember. It was in the living room, but I had a small black and white tv in my room when I was a kid.

Have you bought any new home entertainment gadgets lately? Do you own a VCR? A CD and / or DVD player? iPod? Tivo?

Yeah, I got an iPod for Christmas from my girlfriend. That's pretty much it, all the other home theater items I have already.

Are you a theatergoer? Do you go in your hometown or only when you visit a big city? What are your favorite plays?

I've been to several plays, and I usually like them. I like theater technology, and like trying ot implement it into event planning.

What movie affected you most in your life? Do you remember the way the movie looked mostly, or was it the story line? Who were the stars? Was there music in the movie that you remember? What movies have you wanted to see more than once? What was the last movie you saw? What was the first movie you saw?

I think Lost in Translation affected me the most recently. It kind of gave me hope for romance, not just in a relationship with a woman, but romance in life in general. I remember alot of the music in the movie, mostly asain techno-style ethereal stuff. The last movie I saw, I think, was Broken Flowers. I didn't like it very much at all. The first movie I remember seeing was Popeye with Robin Williams, though I have vague memories of Bambi and a cartoon called Puss in Boots.

Did you ever own any records of Broadway musicals? Which ones?

I have RENT and the Lion King, but I think that's it. I'm not terribly into musicals.

How many hours of TV do you watch a day? Do you watch more now that you used to? What show have you continued to enjoy through the years? Are any of your favorites in reruns now? Which TV shows do you wish they'd bring back? Which TV shows are really dumb, but you like anyway?

A couple. I used to watch alot more. Even if I'm watching TV, I'm doing something else. I still enjoy the occassional episode of Andy Griffith Show nowadays, maybe cause it reminds me of growing up and watching it nearly every evening before the news with my family.

Which comedian makes you laugh the hardest? Do you like them squeaky-clean or do you go in for the racier type? Did you ever buy comedy albums? Did you listen in a family group?

I like Dane Cook and Brian Regan alot now. Dane is really dirty, but Brian is fairly clean.

Did your kids ever like an entertainer whom you hated? Like Elvis? Who is your favorite Beatle? Did you swoon over any of the crooners? Do you actually like any of the performers your children and grandchildren like? Who are they?

I... don't have kids or grandkids.

Did your parents read to you? Did you read to your children? Are you a big reader? How important is reading to you? Do you have an author whom you follow? What are your favorite books? Make your list as long or as short as you'd like!

My mom may have read to me some, I don't remember. I intend to read to my kids alot. Reading is pretty important to me, though I don't get to read much anymore. Mostly because there isn't a lot now that terribly interests me. I like fiction like Wobegon Boy, and non-fiction like Blue Like Jazz.

Do you and your mate enjoy the same types of entertainment? Or does each of you have a different set of friends with whom you attend performances?

I think so. We have some pretty starkly different tastes in some things, but enough to share them as interests. We try to enjoy performances together, and I don't remember any that one of us has hated.

Who are your favorite artists in your time or in the world? Have you sought out gallery-going in your life? What are some of the best galleries you've visited in the world?

I've never really gotten to visit any big galleries. I like Monet and Munck, and the cliche Van Gogh.

Favorite poetry? What lines from poems stick in your mind?

I like e.e. cummings alot. She being Brand is one of my favorites.

What are your most treasured "artifacts" or pieces of art that you have picked up along your path?

Um, not much. I'd like to buy some art, but it's a little too much of a luxury.

---

Careers

What was your first real job? Did you start out in an after-school job that had any relation to what you ended up doing?

My first real job was at my grandparents' ice cream store. No, it has nothing to do with what I'm doing now.

Describe your career.

I am a sound editor for a company called VirtuosoWorks, Inc. We make a music notation software product called Notion.

Has anyone helped you up the ladder, even with the first job? Was it easy for you to ask for or accept this help?

I'm not sure I ever really climbed the ladder, much less got help for it. I definately got help getting jobs, most of the jobs I've gotten I've heard about from friends.

Are you union or management?

Neither. Just a guy.

What career would you have chosen If you didn't have to think about money or education (just assuming both were taken care of)?

Probably some sort of ministry, especially to students and twenty-somethings.

What got you the most upset at work?

I guess when people have gotten upset with me for no reason, or people not doing their jobs and putting the work onto me. Luckily, my job now is great for that, there haven't been any truly stressful days.

Did you get along with your co-workers and bosses? Did you sense anger and frustration at your work place? Was there a feeling of teamwork?

Now there is definately a comraderie and a feeling of teamwork. We all like each other, even if we get on each others' nerves on occasion due to spending so much time together.

Were you ever the boss? Would you have wanted to be? Did you ever run your own business? How did it start?

Nope.

What was a "power lunch" in your day? What kind of meal was it - three martinis or the blue-plate special?

Nice lunch at a chain restaurant. Maybe alcohol, but usually not. I don't have any power-lunches now.

Were you friendly with your coworkers? Is there one you particularly remember?

I get along really well with my coworkers. We get a lot of chances to talk and hang out.

Did you have a secretary? Were you very dependent on the secretary or administrative assistant?

I've never had a secretary. I was a receptionist for a bit, though.

What was your boss like? Was he or she a frightening person or a benevolent person?

I've had lots of bosses. Most of them have been rather nice.

What lessons did you learn about your career and thoughts about work? Looking back at your career, what is it that it meant to you?

I've learned different things from different jobs. Not many of those things were unrealted to the job.

Do you think your workplaces were friendly places for employees? What was the overriding attitude in the place? Did management mix with workers?

Yeah, it was usually friendly. I had a lot of female bosses who treated me like one of their kids.

How did you feel on Mondays? How did you feel on Fridays? Were you dead tired at the end of the day? Mentally or physically? Or spiritually? Or did you often not want the day to end?

Mondays are usually tiring and frustrating. Fridays are restless, doing everything I can to get out as quickly as possible. I'm almost always tired at the end of a day.

Did you have a mentor? Were you a mentor? When did you realize that there was someone looking up to you as a professional person in your chosen career?

I'm ocassionally a mentor at my present job. Nothing deep, just training in some of the techniques we use that I happened to develop.

Did you ever ride through rocky times at your workplace? Was your company sold or taken over?

I made it through a recent round of layoffs.

Did you feel that you had a career, or just a job?

They've all been just jobs, though my current job feels the closest to a career that I've had, mostly because it's the most relevant to my skill-set.

What is your greatest accomplishment at work?

Not sure it's happened yet.

Did you ride mass transit to work? Did you see the same people every day?

No. I drive.

Was there a place you went to lunch a lot at work? Was it close by? Was there one person you went to lunch with more than others? Did you often go alone?

I usually eat at my desk, but I've been to lots of places downtown.

Did you ever socialize with your boss? Did he take you out for lunch or drinks?

I have gone out with bosses before. I enjoy socializing with bosses.

Would you call yourself ambitious? Ambitious for money, power, influence, or something else? Would you call yourself a leader or a follower?

I think I'm ambitious, but mostly for significance. I think I'm a leader, also, and wish I had more opportunities to be one.

What about you led to the career choices you made? Special interests, or were your decisions purely economic? Or did the choice just kind of happen?

Um, the need for a job to pay bills.

Have the things you purchased been worth the work you have done to buy them?

I guess. Mostly speeding tickets, from speeding to work.

Was your profession a respected one in your community?

Seems to be, those that understand it anyway.

Do you think you were paid fairly at jobs throughout your life?

Does anyone think that? Of course not.

Were you ever fired or laid off? How did you cope with that?

I was laid off. I didn't take it well, was pretty mad, because it was very soon after I started.

Were you promoted? Did it come unexpectedly, or did you let it be known you wanted the job? Who told you? How did you feel and react when you heard the news?

I was promoted once, and was excited about the possibility of a raise, though it never came. I was simply given more responsibility.

Were you ever passed over for a position you thought you deserved? Why?

Yeah. No idea.

Did you ever have to deal with a strike at your place of business? Did you walk the picket line? Did you have to cross it? How did that affect things about the job?

Never seen that.

Did you define yourself by your job? Were you proud when people asked you what you did, or would you rather have been able to say something else?

Depended on the job. My current job is cool, so I like telling people about it.

Did you have a good balance of home and work?

I wish I had more time off, to pursue other things.

Is there a business person you particularly admire? Why?

Um, not really.

---

Gallup Organization Questions on Leadership

Let's identify some early role models of yours. How would you describe the parenting style of your mother (father)?

Good, friendly, but a little distant. She had lots of other things going on.

While growing up, who did you consider your role model in terms of your family? What impact did your role model have on your development?

Not sure I really had one. Maybe my grandfather.

While growing up, who did you consider your role model in terms of individuals outside your family? What impact did your role model have on your development?

It was usually men in my church, in high school especially. They were very important in my learning how to start being a godly man.

Think back during high school or before and describe someone who had a profoundly positive impact on your development? What did that person do? Who was that person?

David Zaritsky. He was my small group leader in high school, and he had a son my age. He and I had nothing in common, but we got along very well. His faith was very important to him. He is a messianic jew, and taught me alot about how much Christians owe to ancient jewish tradition.

Think back to your first job and describe the type of leader your first supervisor was to you. What did you like best about that person? Least?

I remember them being kind of harsh. I don't think I worked there long.

Which famous leaders did you look up to while growing up? Describe why you looked up to them in terms of the characteristics, behavior, accomplishments, etc.

I can't really think of any specifically. They were usally musicians or sports stars.

How would you describe your mother (or guardian) as your leader?

I think a lot of the problems we had stemmed from a lack of understanding and empathy, on both of our parts.

How would you describe your father (or guardian) as your leader?

Not one at all. He made it clear that he loved us very much, but acted in a way that was very misguided and self-serving.

Who has had the most profound impact on shaping your values and moral perspective prior to leaving home? What did he or she do to shape your values and moral perspective?

I think it was a combination of extended family and church-types.

Where does your philosophy of life stem from in terms of the people who have had the greatest impact on it? What is your life philosophy?

Christ and him crucified. Sometimes I think God Himself taught me a lot of things, because I can't pinpoint them to any other source.

As far as more recent role models and events, describe the characteristics of your first full-time supervisor. What did you learn from this person that shaped your views about work?

Slimey and sadistic. I learned that some bosses will take advantage of you any way they can to save a buck.

Who has had the most profound impact on your development as an individual during your adult years? Describe how that person has impacted you and who they were in your life?

Mostly my friends, guys from college who were never afraid to tell me things like they were, and who were all very wise and loved me very much.

Describe what constitutes the ideal person you want to work for.

Myself.

Or a pastor who is open to new ways of doing things and is passionate about people.

What has been your most valuable life lesson that has shaped your moral and ethical perspective?

To live for God alone.

Describe a moment either in or out of work, that has had a profoundly positive impact on your development? Describe a negative moment?

I'd say alot of the moments were good, but felt bad, as character development usually happens.

---

Romance and Relationships

Do you remember your first kiss?

Yes.

What kind of dating did you do in high school? What is your favorite kind of date - even now?

I dated casually in high school. My favorite kind of date now simply involves sitting home and watching a movie.

Were you always attracted to the same type of person? Did you like the strong, silent type, the bouncy blonde?

There has definately been a trend in the girl's I've dated. They've all been beautiful, petite, funny, and never put up with my garbage. They usually know how to make fun of me as much as I make fun of them.

Who was your first love? Did you think it was going to last? Who broke whose heart?

Her name was Jamie. I did think it was going to last. That's was before the cynicism set in. She broke up with me, and I guess I was more upset at the lack of closure than of actually getting dumped. In retrospect, it was the best thing that could have happened to me.

Do you believe you can be in love more than once?

Yes. I think the term "in love" is deceptive, like it happens to you and you have no control over it. Love is a decision you make every day. Sometimes that decision is easy, taking zero effort, sometimes it's difficult, but it's always a decision that is made evident in action.

Did you know when you very first met your mate that this would be your life's partner? Did he/she know it?

I don't have a life partner yet. We'll see if my current candidate works out.

Describe your wedding, your outfit, your spouse's, your Mom's, your Dad's, the bridal party, the church or hall, the reception, the food. If more than one wedding - tell all!

None yet.

Was there anything unusual in your wedding vows? Were your knees knocking? Who performed the ceremony?

N/A

What do/did you like best about your mate? (A physical attribute, his/her being, his/her laughter, his/her smile, his/her mind.) What term of endearment do/did you call your mate?

Lots of things. Mostly that she makes me laugh, and is damn cute. Terms of endearment are not public information.

What were the hardest times of your relationship? Was there ever a time that you thought it might really be over?

There have been lots of hard times, but I have never thought for a second that it would be over. I don't think I could have handled thinking about that.

Who were the biggest crushes in your life? Name your other heartthrobs through the years.

I... don't think I'm going to answer this question.

What song do you consider the most romantic?

Lots of songs, mostly by folk types like James Taylor and David Wilcox.

Did you date much before your chose a partner?

Average amount I guess.

What was your last relationship like? Were you unhappy when it ended? What did you learn in that relationship?

Very short. I wasn't happy when it ended, though I'm glad now that it did. The relationship didn't last long enough for me to learn anything.

Everybody has bad habits -- what drives you craziest about your mate?

I'm not answering this one, either.

If you had to do it all over again, what qualities would you choose in a mate now?

This question has no point.

Did you ever have an unrequited love?

Yes, more than requited, unfortunately.

Have you gone ahead and chosen a mate just because they loved you first?

No. I can't imagine that.

Is there a fragrance/perfume/cologne that always brings to mind someone special (or not so special) when you smell it?

Yes, but I couldn't pinpoint the name of the scent. Coffee usually reminds me of my current love.

What anniversary gift do you remembering giving? What anniversary gift do you remember getting?

I'm not sure we gave gifts on our first anniversary, we just had a nice long date.

Are you a romantic? In words or deeds?

I think so, mostly in words, though. Deeds are tough.

When you are not in a relationship, are you happy to be alone?

I wasn't for a long time. I did manage to feel content right before I met my current girlfriend.

Did you have an engagement ring? What does/did your wedding ring look like? Would you trade it for a bigger, shinier one? Do you wear both rings? Are they inscribed inside?

N/A

What did your mate say when asking you to marry? What was the answer? Where were you?

N/A

How was it when you first met your spouse's parents? Did you get along with your in-laws? What did your own parents say about your mate?

I met Alisa's parents early in the morning. We were all in our pajamas, so it was already kind of awkward for everyone, but it was laughed off, and we had fun.

Who is the most loving and romantic couple you know?

Um, probably the Baumanns. The husband does anything he can to support and care for his wife, which is very inspiring to those of us who aren't like that naturally.

Where did you go on your honeymoon? Did you ever take a second honeymoon?

N/A

Talk about your first place together...was it a place you loved or were you making due?

N/A

Looking back now, did you get married at the right time or should you have waited longer or done it earlier?

N/A

In your years of being together what have you learned about your mate that you didn't know when you met?

All the typical intimate things about her personality. Her fears and dreams.

What have you learned about yourself?

What a bastard I can be.

Describe your search for love.

Not sure I really searched. It kind of fell into my lap, so to speak.

---

Favorites

What is your favorite candy bar? Where do you usually buy it? Grocery? Drug store? Gas station? Airport?

Three Musketeers. I haven't had one in a long time.

What is your favorite birthday cake? Do you buy it in a store or does some you love bake it? What ice cream do you like? Do you get it at an ice cream parlor or in the freezer section of a store?

Cheesecake, probably. I like Baskin-Robbins Pralines and Cream ice cream.

What's your favorite dessert? Can you prepare it yourself?

Ice cream. I can scoop it, if that's what you mean.

Where is your favorite beach? How far did you have to drive or bicycle to get there?

Not really a beach person, though I like Southern California, mostly due to the memories I have there.

What is your favorite cartoon character or comic strip? Which comics do you remember reading when you were growing up?

Calvin and Hobbes. I remember liking Garfield when I was a kid.

What is your favorite perfume or cologne? What fragrance gives you the nicest childhood memories and which one gives you the best adult memories?

I don't usually wear it. I like lavender sometimes on girls.

Name your favorite books.

Wobegon Boy, Couplehood, Blue Like Jazz.

What is your favorite rock group?

It changes every five minutes. I'm listening to Eastmountainsouth right now.

What are your all-time favorite movies?

Swingers, About a Boy, Lost in Translation

What's your favorite beverage?

Coke, unfortunately.

Do you have a favorite bar? Have you ever had one too many?

I don't go to bars, and I've never been drunk.

What foods do you look forward to eating in the summer? Autumn?

Ice cream. Pie.

What is your favorite sports team? Did you ever have a sports figure that was particularly important to you? Do you attend games or watch on T.V.?

Duke basketball, Redskins or Carolina football.

Do you have a favorite Broadway show or musical? Who is your favorite author or literary figure? Who are your favorite movie stars? Who are your favorite TV stars?

I like RENT and Stomp. Favorite author is Garrison Keillor. I don't really have a favorite movie or tv star.

Different times of life are satisfying for different reasons. Which has been the most satisfying for you? (i.e., Three kids and station wagon stage, when you became the boss, when you were pursuing your education? The least satisfying?)

The last several years, where I really feel like I have some handle on life, and I don't feel like I'm spinning out of control. I don't expect it to last very long.

Who are your best friends? Why are they your best friends? How long have you know each of them?

Tim and Benton and Graham. I've known them since college.

What is your favorite holiday? Where do you celebrate it? Where did you celebrate it when growing up

Thanksgiving. At my parents' house then and now.

Where is the special place you go that gives you calm? Who is your favorite person to give you calm? To make you laugh? To listen?

My living room is calming. My girlfriend is really good at all of those things.

What's your favorite restaurant? Favorite dish?

La Fiesta right now. I like the nachos supreme.

Is there a toast you use time and time again?

Um, no.

Is there a prayer you use time and time again?

"Help!"

What is your favorite flower? Favorite color?

Not sure I have a favorite flower. My favorite color is probably blue.

What is your favorite time of day? Are you a morning person or a night owl?

Night owl. My favorite time of day is 5 o'clock. It means I'm off work and have the rest of the evening ahead of me.

What sense would you regret losing the most?

Hearing.

What were some of the best days of your life?

College. As hard as it was, I had a lot of fun with my friends.

---

Food

What do you prefer for breakfast on a weekend as opposed to during the week?

I like big breakfasts on weekends. Omelets, bacon, biscuits, grits, hash browns, the whole bit.

What are your favorite restaurants?

I like mexican and italian places the best.

What recipe are you famous for? Did anyone ever insult you regarding your cooking skills? What dish you usually bring to a pot luck or picnic?

I'm an okay cook. I like making stuffed shells the best, I think.

When were you first introduced to coffee? How do you take your coffee? Do you have a favorite mug?

I had coffee for the first time when I was a kid. If I drink it, I usually drink with with lots of sugar and cream.

What is your favorite Campbell's soup?

Maybe tomato. Tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches are a must-have for a rainy saturday.

Do you follow any nutritional "rules" such as strictly vegetarian, kosher, organic, etc.?

Nope.

Have you ever had breakfast in bed?

I don't think so. Maybe when I was sick.

Have you ever been on a successful diet? If so, how many pounds did you lose?

Not really. Ask me again in a bit.

What's the water like in your town? Is it drinkable? Do you drink bottled water by choice?

I like botted water better. The water here is okay, but it could be a lot better.

What personal staples are always and always in your kitchen or refrigerator?

Drinks, ice cream, bread, milk and cereal, frozen dinners.

What's the best snack? What's the best dinner? What do you usually have for lunch?

I like granola bars for a snack. Anything italian for dinner is usually a good bet. I usually have some sort of sandwich for lunch.

Describe some of the picnics you've been on. Family? Romantic? Do you eat seafood? Have you ever eaten it at the shore?

Mostly church picnics. I haven't had seafood in a long time, but when I did, we tried to have it near the beach.

Do you have a favorite cookbook? What cookbook do you remember your family using?

My mom had a Betty Crocker cookbook that I think she's had since I was born.

Do you like farmers' markets on Saturday morning? If so, what do you buy?

I like going. I don't often buy things, though maybe I'll start.

Are you allergic to any food? Anything you cannot stand and will not eat?

I'm allergic to seafood. I can't stand okra, and I'm not a huge fan of hot peppers.

What is your weakness? Sweets?

Bread. Any kind. And ice cream. I don't eat a lot of candy.

What do you consider the best pizza? What's your favorite Chinese dish? What other ethnic foods do you like?

Pizza with meats and mushrooms are the best. I like sesame chicken for chinese, and I like indian and thai food occasionally.

What do you remember as either of your parent's specialty item? Your grandparents?

My mom made a lot of southern food, country kitchen type stuff. Her chicken and dumplings were especially good.

What tastes do you still crave from your youth? Good 'n Plenty? Necco wafers?

Ice cream.

Do you eat better or worse now than when you were a child?

Worse. My mom made pretty healthy meals. I don't eat healthy at all now.

Did you ever have a memorable meal on a train? When you are by yourself in a hotel would you rather eat alone in your room or by yourself in the restaurant?

I'd rather eat alone in my room.

What was your favorite lunch in school?

Pizza. It was the only thing my school could do right.

What do you remember about your first trips to the grocery store as an adult cooking for yourself?

Being very overwhelmed and just heading for the frozen aisle to save myself from having to follow a recipe.

What's the most delicious meal you've ever had?

Not sure. It was probably a Thanksgiving meal.

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Moments From Your Adult Life

Did you and your mate often go dancing? Where? What music did you dance to? Did you and your mate have "our song"? Which dances were popular?

I don't dance. Alisa and I have a song, probably a Keane song.

When you and your friends got together, what did you do? Whose home did you go to most often? Did your children become friends with your friends' children? How did you meet the friends you are most comfortable with now?

Usually watched movies or ate. Most of the friends I have now I met in college.

What kind of movies do you find yourself drawn to....adventure, epic, violent, comedy? Do you go to movies now as much as you used to? Why or why not?

Comedies. I don't enjoy action the way I used to. I can't stand very violent films or horror films.

What books do you like to read? Novels, biographies, romance, science fiction? Do you have a specific part of the house for books? What is the last book you read? Why did you choose that one? Where were you sitting when you read it?

Non-fiction, mostly. I typically read in bed, but I used to have a recliner that was perfect for reading.

Are you friendly with your neighbors? Do you sit down for an evening together on the porch or patio or are you merely cordial with them, nodding acquaintances? Have you ever had a neighbor whom you've loved and lost? Were you close to a family that later moved away?

Not really.

Are you a member of any club or social group? Have you ever spent time doing charitable work? If so, why was the charity important to you?

Mostly church stuff and music stuff. I've helped out at a drug rehab ministry before.

Is there anything you need that you don't have?

Money, time, energy, money.

Do you take a little respite for yourself everyday? For example, a drink before dinner, a walk before dark, or a quiet moment in a spot where you're all alone to collect your thoughts?

Not really. Would be nice if I could.

How do / did you exercise?

I didn't/don't.

What do / did you do for fun?

Music, design, movies and tv.

What are your hobbies?

See "What I do for fun?"

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Politics and History

Who was the best president of any country ever? Who was the worst president? Which president of the United States did you admire most? Did you ever meet a famous politician? What happened?

I hesitate to try to answer a question quantifying the value of people like world leaders, because there always seems to be a way to spin the pros and cons of any president.

Do you have a strong political party alliance? Have you ever worked on a campaign? Have you ever worked at a polling place?

I'm a registered Republican. I have deep issues with both parties, but couldn't bring myself to be a Democrat. I guess I'm a conservative who wishes big companies would be more socially responsible, Christians would worry more about social justice than lobbying, and tobacco fields should dug up and replaced with food crops that could feed the hungry instead of clogging up the lungs of the complacent. Abortion sucks but it's none of my business. If homosexuals want to marry, who am I to stop them? I think my problem has more to do with the way the DNC behaves than with what they believe.

Which domestic problems are most important in your town today? In your country? In the world?

Locally, our education system is beyond messed up. The school board is full of corrupt people who are simultaneously overly politically correct. They serve only themselves and not the kids or the parents.

Domestically, I think there are so many issues that go beyond party lines that I sort of think we should just start over.

Internationally, I think poverty and human rights violations are vitally important issues to act on. It troubles me that so many leaders have such a firm grip on their constituents. Money and greed and power are so unique in their ability to corrupt nearly anyone, that I'm glad of been spared from most of its ramifications personally.

What have been your causes over the years? What did you do about issues that bother you?

I've worked with the Urban Ministry and with churches to help those who struggle with poverty and drugs and alcohol. In high school I worked with an organization helping those with addiction, simply talking to peopel and letting them tell me their story.

Which campaign slogans stick in your mind? Why?

I'm not sure any slogans stick in my mind. I guess I'm glad to have forgotten all the propaganda.

Have you ever gone against popular opinion or beliefs and, if so, has this caused any problems?

I usually go against popular opinions. I guess when you're freaking huge you don't have to care what people think about you.

Have you seen racial injustice first hand? Have you ever been the target of prejudice?

Not really, I was lucky to go to a school that was rather accepting. I know it happens, I just do my best to keep it far away from me.

Is there a government policy that you strongly disagree with? Did you ever demonstrate about it?

I like the idea of the ONE campaign and get kind of upset that the US refuses to even consider it.

How do you feel about the United Nations?

Not really a fan. The Oil for Food scandal and refusal to act on its own resolutions kind of burned me.

Do you think the welfare system is run correctly?

No. I think it's taken advantage of by way too many people and has become a bureaucratic nightmare. Too many people buy groceries with food stamps then load them into their Lexuses (or is it "Lexi"?).

Do you follow local goings on in city government? Have there been cases of corruption or scandal that rocked your town?

Not sure of any that rocked my town, but there are lots of little ones that have easy-listeninged it or pop-countried it.

Have you ever run for office? Did you win? Have you ever been on jury duty? What was the case? Did you decide the defendant guilty or innocent? Was it a hard judgment call?

I've never run for office, and was called for jury duty once but wasn't selected.

Did you personally know anyone victimized during the McCarthy area?

Um, no. I'd actually like to research the MacCarthy era a little more and learn about it myself. I'm not convinced he was as evil as he is portrayed.

What are your feelings about the space program? Where were you when Neil Armstrong walked on the moon? Do you believe we actually landed on the moon?

I like the space program, it just seems to be a money pit. I wasn't born yet when we landed on the moon, and I have no reason to believe that we didn't.

Do you own a flag? Do you display it?

I might have a Union Jack somewhere. I don't have it displayed anywhere.

Did you build a bomb shelter and, if so, how did you supply it?

Um, no.

Where were you when you heard about Pearl Harbor?

History class.

Do you mostly vote for losers or winners?

Usually the winners. I can usually tell who will win an election beforehand.

Did you have loved ones who went to war?

My stepdad fought in Vietnam and got a purple heart, but this was before I was born, so no one I knew ever went off to war in my lifetime.

Where were you when Franklin Roosevelt died? Where were you when John F. Kennedy was shot? Where were you when Robert Kennedy was shot? Where were you when Martin L. King was shot? Where were you when you heard about September 11th?

The only one of these events I was alive for was 9-11. I was working at a mortgage company and all the news sites were down from all the hits to their server. I turned on the television in the conference room and we all watched the aftermath. I didn't see the planes hit live but I did see the buildings collapse.

Name a LIFE magazine cover you especially remember....a TIME magazine cover....a LOOK magazine cover.

Oh gosh. I don't really remember any in particular. They all seem to have photos that are taken in a way to show you how evil our leaders are.

What do you think was your country's grandest moment during your lifetime? What do you think was your country's lowest national moment?

I think the aftermath of 9-11 and the outpouring of love and support was a great moment for our country. I felt proud to be part of this nation for the first time in a long time.

I think the way we handled Hurricane Katrina was pretty pathetic. Seems like so much could have been done differently. I blame the local and state governments more than anyone else.

Do you believe in gun control?

Yes. I'm not a fan of guns and think the second amendment was great to have when the British were beating down our doors, but now we're cool with them, so it seems a little silly to continue to stand behind it. I'll let the psychologists comment on the gun-as-phallus motif, though I have my own opinion.

Is there a time in history you think it would have been fascinating to live in? Why?

I think living around 1900 would have been cool. I love old music and folk stuff and am fascinated by all of that. I like television too much to want to go back there, though.

What direction do you think the country is going in today?

North.

Have you always been proud to be an American? How does being American feel differently than being an American 40 years ago?

I'm not only American, I'm also British. I would say I'm happy to be an American. I think pride and nationalism gets us into more trouble than it's worth.

What does your nationality mean to you?

I don't think about it much, to be honest.

How have your political views changed over time? Have you become more passionate and political or do you kind of just ignore politics nowadays?

I still believe the same things, I think the changes have been more how I act out those beliefs. I care a lot more about social justice than I did before.

Is there anything more you would like to add about politics? Perhaps a favorite quote that is your abiding philosophy?

I'm good, thanks.

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Your House Now

Why do you like your home? What do you dislike about your home? Do you have an attic? If so, what is in it?

I wish my apartment was bigger. I look forward to having a house that is large enough for all of my junk. I'd also like to have an art and music studio in the house, some sort of creative space where I could go to be inspired.

What is the most comfortable room in your home? What is your favorite chair? Favorite place to read? Where do you usually sit to talk on the phone? Where do you usually do your computer work?

I guess my bedroom is the most comfortable. I don't have a lot of rooms to choose from. I like reading there and working there. I do look forward to getting my computer out of that room, though, and reserving my bedroom for sleeping. I usually lie in bed and talk on the phone. I take my glasses off and close my eyes so I'm not distracted and the person I'm talking to has my full attention.

Tell us about your dream home. Where is it located? What does it look like? What is special about it?

I'd like to live kind of in the country, not too far away from everything, but kind of secluded. The house would be a decent size, because I love the idea of hosting lots of people and giving friends who are visiting a place to stay for a weekend or whatnot. I want a small project recording studio in the basement, and maybe even one day having a huge refinished barn or something in the back for live concerts and other events.

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Everyday Life

What have been your personal landmarks in your life? (e.g., restaurant in your neighborhood, gas station, museum, barn)

Lots of things have happened downtown here, at lots of different coffeeshops or restaurants. Big events usually happen at someone's house.

What grocery store do you use? How much do you usually spend each trip?

There's a Harris Teeter pretty close by, and I like going to the Fresh Market or Whole Foods in town. I usually spend about $75 per trip.

Favorite drug store? Know your pharmacist by name? Favorite drycleaner? What's your favorite book store, hardware store, cookwares store?

I go to the same drugstore, but I don't have to go often, so I don't know anyone there by name. For bookstores, I like the chains, like Barnes & Noble and Borders, and the used bookstore here is pretty cool.

What time do you get up in the morning?

I've been getting up earlier than usual lately, around 7am, which some may consider late, but I don't have to be at work till 9, so it gives me plenty of time to chill or go to work early.

What part of housework do you dislike the most? Do you have a housekeeper or a handyman?

I'm not a fan of doing dishes. This is mostly due to the fact that I'm rather tall and most kitchen counters are made for normal-sized people, so my back statrs killing me after a while.

What's your daily routine?

Drag myself out of bed. Go to work. Come home. Eat dinner. Get some freelance work done. Watch the tube. Call the girl. Go to bed.

Is there someone you talk with everyday?

Yes, Alisa.

Talk about getting older. Do you ever feel slowed by age? When did you start feeling this?

I've been noticing it more lately. I think it's weight slowing me down more than age.

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Habits

Are you usually late or early?

I'm usually on-time for stuff, unless it's my job, in which case I'm chronically 2 minutes late.

Are you more comfortable speaking or writing? Do you enjoy talking on the phone more than writing letters?

Much more comfortable writing. But, oddly enough, I'd much rather talk on the phone than write letters.

What is the first thing you usually do when you come home from work?

Look in the fridge. Grab a drink, and sit.

What is your bedtime ritual? Do you read before going to sleep or watch a late-night talk show?

I usually stay up way too late, and end up working on something or watching a talk show or both.

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Appearance

Describe what you look like now. Have you been happy with the way you look? What did you look like as a teenager? As a young child? If you had to name a famous person whom you looked like, who would it be? Who would you most like to look like?

I'm 6'3", about 340 lbs. I could stand to lose weight. As a teenager, I looked about the same, just in better shape.

Has your appearance played an important part in your getting along in the world? Do you think it's been detrimental or beneficial?

Well, I've always been larger than most around me, so I've managed to leverage that into a rather lucrative career in intimidation.

What is your best feature? Your worst? Do you have any birthmarks or scars that differentiate your looks absolutely from anyone else?

Alisa: "His best features are his freckles. Or eyes, his eyes are nice. Mouth isn't half bad, either."

Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, did you end up doing it? If not, why not? In all truth, are you vain?

Um, no plastic surgery. But I am vain.

What is your family look?

Red hair is the most common trait among members of my family.

Have you ever had any facial hair? Did you try different styles of mustaches and beards? What is the natural color of your hair?

My hair is red, and I have a goatee. I've grown a beard several times, usually in winter, when I hope it will keep me warm, but it usually just itches.

Do you tan or burn?

Burn. Pretty easily.

Were you upset when you first noticed signs of aging? When did this happen? When did you first get gray hairs? When did you notice that you had an "adult's" body with a little extra padding?

I've recently developed a little grey around my temples. It started about the same time my current relationship did. I'm just sayin'.

What preventive measures do you take to ensure good health?

Um, I read the label on a bottle of vitamins once.

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Vehicles

What are you driving now? How many years have you had this vehicle?

A Honda Accord. I've had it for about two years.

When did you get your first car? Did you buy it yourself or did your parents help you?

I got my mom's Subaru station wagon when I was 17. It didn't last very long.

What was your absolute most favorite vehicle purchase?

The next one will be, I imagine.

How much did gas cost when you got your first car?

Around a dollar per gallon, and that wasn't even that long ago.

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